(Speech impediment) Oh hi Rusty, I was expecting you They eat babies you know Wha? I’ve seen them, they had a whole baby in their mouth, gobbled them up! And didn’t even chew! You and I both know that’s not true. They also breath fire and drink orange cats blood for breakfast! Where’d you hear that? I read it in a book once! You can’t read. I saw it in a book once! What about date night, Rusty? I never agreed to date night. But- I’ll just be in there for a little bit, I just want to look around You’re not the boss of me Smudge. Well FINE, have fun having your babies be eaten. The food I made you will just go cold than. Be back by eleven. (Music) (SLURP SLURP SLURP) Is that a fuckin’ orange? Nice mouse ya got there. It’d make a really nice gift to me, if ya ever wanted to give me somthin’ Do you eat babies? Nope I’m Graypaw By the way. I’m from the one and only ThunderClan. This is my first time outta camp, I’m only an apprentice, if I was even half a warrior I would’ve popped you like a beachball Why? Cuz you’re on ThunderClan territory- Graypaw! What did I tell you about talkin to living bowling balls? Oh! Hi Bluestar! This is my friend. . . Uh Rusty. I mean. . . Yeah, I’m Rusty It’s really impressive how you caught that mouse. HMMMMMMMMM This is my mentor Lionheart! I’m Lionheart! And this is Whitestorm! Greetings. And that’s Bluestar. HMMMMMMMMMM GASP You know it’s hard life out here. We need to hunt to survive You can’t just come in here on our territory and take what you like, that’s stealing! Golly gee! I’m sorry! We need prey to feed everyone! If you steal our prey you’re going to make us all starve! YOU KILLED EVERYONE! THEY’RE ALL DEAD BECAUSE OF YOU! We need more warriors you know. Bluestar, you don’t mean. . .? Rusty, do you want to join ThunderClan? Hmm, I don’t know Yes! Are you sure? Yes! Let’s go YAAAAYYY So. . . What’s it like in ThunderClan? It’s like a big camp where everyone cares and protects each other, And uh, protects our territory from other Clans and stuff. Other Clans? (Whitestorm) Shush, we’re almost there. Music Woah. . . AHEM (Whispers) Who in the godddamn world is that? This is our new apprentice Rusty! He’s going to join ThunderClan! AWW YEAH (cough) Gosh, like seriously? SCOFF Is that a freaking cheese puff? I guess your letting any chump in here that conforms to your conformist standards! You uh. . . you gonna take that? I’m not scared of you Longtail! GO! Fight! Fight! Fight! GOSH! I guess I’ve got to teach this kid not to mess with the DarkLord. Rah! Oh! Oof! Ow! Oof OOOOFFFF GOSH! You like, ruined my hair you Rockmelon! Nice Fighting. . . Hm. Your coat looks like a Target Brand of fire in this sunlight. Thank you! Your new name shall be Firepaw! Welcome to ThunderClan. *welcomes eeeeeAAAAAHHHHGHGHHH Wha happen? Oakheart killed Redtail in battle, I avenged him while he was gloating over his victory. *Sigh He’s with StarClan now. What’s StarClan? StarClan’s where good cats go when they die! Each warrior’s a star in the sky, they watch over us. But, what if you’re bad? Where do you go? Let’s go see how Ravenpaws doin’! Is. . . Is he with StarClan? No, He’ll be fine. He just needs some rest. I’ll bury him myself, he’s hunting with StarClan now. NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! Huh, I guess I’ll show you around then. This is the nursery. This is the Warriors den. AHEM Since the duties of the clan come first, I must appoint a new deputy right away. Lionheart will be the new deputy of ThunderClan. Why didn’t they make TigerClaw deputy? Because he sucks. I Will now spend one last night in vigil for my lost best friend and deputy Huh. Looks like Redtails Dead-tail I’ll show you where we sleep! Scoff! is that a gross tomatoe? Pay no attention to Sandpaw, nobody likes her. SCOFF Lie down here, next to me. Night. Goodnight!