Epic Rap Battles Of Warriors. Cinderpelt, Versus, Spottedleaf! [Begin!] Sit yourself down, and prepared to be schooled. Don’t think for a second you can play me as a fool. I can say with certainty, your jealously is showing- ‘Cuz, Spotty, when you’re dead and gone the world keeps on going you’ve been blessed with my presence since the very beginning. I’ve graced every dream you’ve had the privilege of seeing. There’s no competition when it comes to you and me. But what can I say? I’m just the queen of prophecies. The only throne you sit on is your self-righteous ass. You think you’re so pretty, but eh, I’ll give you a pass. Something ’bout that just seems so defensive. I’d talk about your looks, but it might get offensive. I can’t help but notice how you’re pretty much a stalker, but no one gives a shit because you’re such a sweet talker. You’re already dead and still want a piece of Firestar? Okay, that’s actually pretty bizarre. I’ll pretend I’ve hadn’t heard that for the millionth time. You lack so much creativity it really should be a crime. I do wonder why- he never noticed your obsession. Oh, his choice in a mate should answer that question. Just what I expected the party of squabbling pussies, going on about who’s better when we all know you’re just hussies. StarClan’s sake, Spotted, you’re like a flea that won’t quit. I’d like to finish this myself, but Maple beat me to it. And here we have poor Cinder, the tragically disfigured. Your subtle hints ain’t working, and your message didn’t deliver. There’s no use in arguing, so put away your pride. Cause look at here, ladies, I’m the queen who’s by his side. Ugh, Sandstorm? What are you doing here? Yeah, the title says, “Cinderpelt Vs. Spottedleaf.” Sorry for butting in, girls, but, uh, I couldn’t keep watching this train wreck go down! [Gasp] That’s it, Sand. You think that you can play rough? You got less book time than a stick, you neglected, pushy wash-up No seriously, now. Who even let you compete? You’ll forever be a ‘broken paw’ who can’t stand on her feet. Sandstorm? Try ‘Saltstorm.’ I think it really suits you. Your bitterness makes sense, I’m a lot to live up to. The writers couldn’t stand you, so buh-bye by book two, cut off before your encore, didn’t finish your debut. I got ten, bitch! Go on and live up to that. You’re a sorry source of man-pain, a disgrace to us she-cats. You’re joking right? You two just be kidding. I’m the only one who’s been here since the very beginning! Okay, I’ll admit, you’ll go down in history as a petty little rat now that’s your legacy. Had to hate him, just to hate him for no reason at all then I guess you turned around when he didn’t let you fall. Oh, boo-hoo, jealous you couldn’t save your life? Nobody asked you to be all bark and no bite. What’s even more pathetic? Homegirl died twice! That’s what you get when you try to play it nice. Oh, StarClan, both of you are killing me here! Please do us all a favor and just disappear, but that’s already happened, so it’s none of my concern Do you wittle babies need some herbs for that burn? [Trying to argue over one another] Whoa! Ladies, ladies! There is enough of me to go around. My name is Firestar, leader of the four Clans. If you need a job done, you know I’m your man. Are you being serious right now? Ugh. Okay, you know what? I’m mortified we tried to fight over a guy. It might do us some good if we put this hate aside. Yeah, screw the toms, let’s have some girl pride! All together now, she-cats unite!